I Failed
by SweetMemories1998
Summary: "Promise me that you'll look after Gray." Juvia had tried so hard to keep that promise. She had spent months training with him, helping him in his quest, comforting him. Until he had left and the memory of Silver began to haunt her. Now, as they were both dying, she was determined to do anything to save Gray. She couldn't fail him again. (Gruvia Angst (Alvarez Arc) (chapter 499)


**Good afternoon, dearest readers. How's your day going so far? Good?**

 **If so, it's about to take a turn because here** **I come with another prompt from Angst Week.**

 **Again, this one isn't even the saddest story I've written in the past week.** **There is one which is much worse and I'm even considering not posting it cause I don't want to break your hearts any further.**

 **Anyways, I can't take all the credit for this one-shot. It was actually brought up by an anonymous person on tumblr and I'd like to thank whoever that was (if you're even on this website).**

 **Here's their prompt: "** _Here's some angst for you. When Juvia defeated Keys during the Tartaros arc, Silver asked Juvia to take care of Gray. Skip to when Gray was in Avatar, Juvia was worried sick! Although, it wasn't because of her being obsessed over Gray, it was because she let Silver down..."_

 **Happy reading! (or well, not so happy)**

* * *

 _October 15th, X792..._

"Why did you do it too?" Gray stared at her in disbelief, silent tears beginning to fall.

"No!" Juvia screamed, shaking her head. Her eyes didn't leave the sword that was buried in his stomach.

"I didn't want to hurt a friend...No, I didn't want to hurt _you_." He admitted.

"Gray..." She was crying now-her sobs echoing through the empty street.

"I just wanted...to protect you." He swallowed hard. "But I failed." Why did he have to fail now? He had managed to save her before, so why not now?

* * *

 _1 year before..._

 _"Juvia, I have to tell you something." He remembered that moment so clearly. It had been the most awkward and terrifying moment of his life._

 _"Okay." Her eyes had focused on him and there had been a hopeful glint in them. Did she believe that he was about to confess to love her?_

" _Well...you see..." In truth Gray hadn't been sure what to tell her. He had just known that he needed to say something because that night might as well be their last._

 _He never got the opportunity to, though. Before they knew what was happening, Lyon had screamed her name and then there was a laser beam coming straight towards Juvia._

 _In that moment, Gray hadn't thought about how stupid his plan was. He hadn't considered the fact that Juvia could turn her body into water so it wouldn't hit her._

 _He didn't even know how it happened, but his body had acted before his brain could process it. Soon he had been pushing her away, placing himself right in the direction of the laser._

 _He remembered seeing her horrified look as she screamed his name again and again. Her desperation and clear anguish had caused his heart to tighten, but Gray had told himself it was for the best._

 _Even though he hadn't wanted to die, if it came between himself and her, the choice was easy. He couldn't lose her. He just couldn't._

 _That is the main reason why he had sacrificed himself that night. As pain overwhelmed his body once the lasers were shot, the only thought in his mind had been that he had done it._

 _He had saved her and that was all that mattered._

* * *

"You've made me so happy." Juvia told him and she was smiling despite the tears.

"You've made me happy too. You know that, right?" He was crying now, unable to help it anymore.

"How could they do that? It shouldn't be possible." Invel was muttering, but they payed no attention.

"I'm sorry, Juvia. It wasn't supposed to end like this." Gray said just before falling, unable to keep standing.

In almost perfectly timing, Juvia did the same. As they lay there, on the cold hard ground, so close to death, she remembered the one promise she hadn't been able to keep.

* * *

 _3 months before..._

" _Promise me that you'll look after Gray." Silver had told her just after she'd done the unthinkable._

" _I will." Overcome with emotions and tears, that was all she had managed to say, but she had meant it._

 _In the months following the war, after she and Gray moved in together, she did everything she could to make him happy._

 _She aided him in his search for E.N.D, trained with him to help him grow stronger, held him in her arms after he had a nightmare and comforted him in the rare moments he allowed himself to be vulnerable._

 _Juvia tried to be his rock, even though she was just as broken. She pushed aside her own fears and the overwhelming guilt of killing Silver and focused solely on Gray._

 _She thought it was working out, until he left. Disappeared all of sudden and she knew it was her fault._

 _She had failed him once again and Silver too. What would he say if he learned that she had broken her promise?_

 _Loneliness made her lose her mind and she started seeing him everywhere. Every time she would attempt to cook for herself or leave the house, his face would appear._

 _Over and over, he would tell her that she was a failure and didn't deserve his son. He would remind her of every time she'd failed to protect Gray and it was unbearable._

 _Even worse than losing the man she loved, was having the man she'd unwillingly murdered say she deserved it._

 _Juvia had always heard people say that sometimes the truth hurts more than lies and it was accurate._

 _Before Silver began to haunt her, she had managed to convince herself that it was all fine and she could make Gray happy._

 _What a fool she had been. She had let everyone down and there was no way to fix it now. Silver was gone because of her, so was Gray._

 _She had failed them and that would forever haunt her._

* * *

"You failed again." Silver appeared in front of her as she clung to life.

"I'm sorry." It was all she could say.

"Sorry isn't enough." He shook his head. "I entrusted my son's life to you. You were supposed to take care of him since I couldn't."

"I tried...I didn't mean to..." Juvia whimpered.

"You let me down and you let him down. Maybe you deserve to die." He continued, each harsh word making her sob even more.

"But he doesn't." She looked back towards Gray, who was coughing, trying to stay alive.

"Then save him." Silver told her, determined. "Do whatever it takes to keep your promise. Unless you want to have his blood on your hands."

She didn't. She didn't want Gray to die; that was the whole reason why she had tried to kill herself. "I will, even if it's the last thing I do."

But how could she save him? He was bleeding to death and she didn't have healing powers nor enough energy to cast any spell.

Bleeding. Blood. A transfusion. That could work.

"Please, don't let me fail him again." Juvia pleaded to whatever god might be listening while gathering all of her energy for her ultimate spell: water make-blood.

As her life faded away, she barely took notice of Gray's arms holding her while he desperately called her name, begging her not to leave him.

All Juvia saw was the small smile on Silver's face as he too began to fade. "Thank you." And with those simple words, a calmness washed over her and, for once, she felt peaceful.

* * *

 **So, what did you think? Were they in character? Do you think Juvia might've felt this way after Silver's death?**

 **Honestly, I wish the Gray x Silver x Juvia relationship had been explored further. Don't get me wrong, I love the confession in the snow + heartwarming hug scene, but I still wanted there to be repercussions.**

 **He was Gray's father, after all, and I'm sure that Juvia's guilt for killing him wouldn't have gone away so easily.**

 **Stay tuned for the next installment in the Angst Series: A NaLu and NaLi story based on Safe Haven, by Nicolas Sparks. (if you've watched that movie, you know what's coming)**

 **The first chapter should be posted this weekend, depending on your response to this one.**

 **Have a wonderful day, everyone! Don't let all of this angst get you down.**


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